eredien: Dancing Dragon (Default)
2016-03-17 06:37 pm
Entry tags:

[Book Review] Ceili by Moriah Gemel

[NB: I'm friends with Moriah IRL.]

Today's my birthday, and I've spent most of it thinking about words or lost in words--as fine a way as one could wish to spend one's birthday, really, if you're me.

One of the things I read today was Moriah Gemel's brand-new novel by Interlude Press, which goes by the title of Ceili.

It's a very fast read at a tad under 200 pages, and has only a little bit in common with her prior novel Load the Dice (namely, the loving and lush descriptions of the characters, a romance between two men, and depiction of some consensual sex).

The plot, in a sketch, with as few spoliers as possible: Devon Caelin has never quite fit in in the world. When he wanders into a bar populated by, run by, and visible only to Fae one damp LA night, he learns that he is a changeling--a fae child, raised by humans. This book is his exploration of himself, his newfound magic, and his budding relationship with the elven Lord, Eldan, who runs the place.

This book's strength lies in the relationships drawn between its characters. Each person--even the bit players like the boto (Amazonian River Dolphin) Cristiano--feels drawn as if the author sat down with them multiple times to interviews over pizza and the best kind of beer.

If there is a flaw in this book, I think it's that the delicious twist--which I will not spoil here, and have not seen in other books in the last-fae-in-the-city genre, which is a trope this book fits squarely into--comes almost too late. I sure hope there will be a sequel exploring the last-chapter decisions of the main characters.

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eredien: Dancing Dragon (dragon)
2016-03-17 06:37 pm

[Book Review] Ceili by Moriah Gemel

[NB: I'm friends with Moriah IRL.]

Today's my birthday, and I've spent most of it thinking about words or lost in words--as fine a way as one could wish to spend one's birthday, really, if you're me.

One of the things I read today was Moriah Gemel's brand-new novel by Interlude Press, which goes by the title of Ceili.

It's a very fast read at a tad under 200 pages, and has only a little bit in common with her prior novel Load the Dice (namely, the loving and lush descriptions of the characters, a romance between two men, and depiction of some consensual sex).

The plot, in a sketch, with as few spoliers as possible: Devon Caelin has never quite fit in in the world. When he wanders into a bar populated by, run by, and visible only to Fae one damp LA night, he learns that he is a changeling--a fae child, raised by humans. This book is his exploration of himself, his newfound magic, and his budding relationship with the elven Lord, Eldan, who runs the place.

This book's strength lies in the relationships drawn between its characters. Each person--even the bit players like the boto (Amazonian River Dolphin) Cristiano--feels drawn as if the author sat down with them multiple times to interviews over pizza and the best kind of beer.

If there is a flaw in this book, I think it's that the delicious twist--which I will not spoil here, and have not seen in other books in the last-fae-in-the-city genre, which is a trope this book fits squarely into--comes almost too late. I sure hope there will be a sequel exploring the last-chapter decisions of the main characters.
eredien: Dancing Dragon (Default)
2012-09-08 11:29 am

[Review] The Dog Stars, by Peter Heller - best post apocalpytic novel since "Children's Hospital"

The Dog Stars by Peter Heller is the best postapocalyptic novels I've read since The Children's Hospital, in both form and content.

A few standouts:
The narration is excellently done: sparse and beautiful at the same time, like a dead tree. Barely any punctuation, bits of haiku mixed in with musings on trout and the narrator's dead wife. You get a sense of the character in full, even as he consciously struggles with his own erratic memory and syntax, which is not quite itself full anymore after his survival of a mostly-deadly plague.

The landscape is part of the plot, in the best and worst ways. It is used for tactics, and it is used for beauty, and it is used for a narrative of personal and worldwide loss; you get the idea that all of these things are, on a fractal level, the same, embodied in the ravaged land.

The book layout -- I got the deckle-edged hardcover from my library -- is fantastic and full of little jokes about stars and dogs: designer Kelly Blair is taking a page from McSweeney's design department in the best possible way. The front of the book's dust jacket features the constellation Sirius, obviously, but the smaller jokes are better. On the back of the dust jacket, the accent constellation mapped below the title is a 'new' constellation called 'the little dog,' which I would not have recognized had I not happened to read a book about star maps on the previous day. This book is published under the Borzoi imprint of Knopf, and on the back dust jacket flap the running Borzoi imprint logo is actually recreated as a constellation of a running dog. I plan on buying this book in hardcover for the jacket design.
The font is also spare and elegant.

There are only really five main characters in this book, each of whom could easily fall into the worst post-apocalyptic cliche, but none of whom do. Such a rich, full novel with such a sparse cast in such a sparse world is a fantastic achievement for a writer and is a delight for a reader.

The apocalpyse itself fits the book's narration and tone, in the way the best postapocalptic literature does: a creeping global warming, then creeping diseases; death as the mass failure of human understanding and technology at the limits of human understanding in the 21st century. But despite that, we see signs that humanity, in general, has not stopped wanting to understand.

This is a profoundly hopeful book. It is a profoundly sad book. It is about death, and being willing to kill for poetry, and powered flight, and dogs, and fly fishing. It is excellent.

Please read it.
eredien: Dancing Dragon (Dancing)
2012-08-29 08:05 pm

Tasklist

Taking a page from [livejournal.com profile] rax:

To buy sooner rather than later:
New SSHD for eee
Glasses (closeup and distance)
Digital Hygrometer/Therm. for Tokai's tank
Printer paper and Ink or professional business card printing 250 cards on order from vistaprint
Updated shade + finial + bulb adapter for restored antique lamp from great-grandmother K-Mart, of all places!
Sheets for my bed
Notary Public Exam Fee

Video games to buy eventually:
Wario DIY Wii
Replacement Pokewalker for the one I lost at the farmer's mkt
Pokemon Black or White?
Okami Wii/DS?
Fire Emblem Gamecube/Wii/GBA?
Gamecube controller for wii

Other stuff to buy eventually:
Silicon Dawn tarot 2x
An apartment
New modular bed+awesome futon mattress of awesome
Mac Webcam xBox Live webcam works natively in Mac for $10. Awesome.
Butterfly Socks

To find:
DS Charger Yeah it was in my DS case ...

To sew:
Dog coat + Hem B.'s jeans
Doll clothes
Baby hat for B. and L.
Bike basket
Redo world's worst-diagrammed crossstitch
Winter hat pack items
Mending

To list on ebay/craigslist:
Freaking model horse collection argh just break into your own storage unit by remembering that your parents' good intentions will never actually lead them to put aside the time to do things they said he would do with you
Spare piano (don't ask); remember shipping deal w/local piano movers Report craiglist scam to craigslist

To write:
Absinthe Writeup
TY notes to people for whom I have petsitted, for asking for a review
WWIA notes digitization
WWIA chap 5
WWIA chap 6
Email replies to friends
Write 3rd stanza Tesla in Love, don't worry about 1st stanza rewrite yet
Writeup and Submit Sumptuary to GURPS company
Movie/Book writeups: Philadelphia Story
Movie/Book writeups: all the crap I read this spring in the hospital (The Picture of Dorian Gray, Winter Triptych, Bird Friendly Building Design, Washington: A Life, Sex on 6 Legs, Jack Reacher novels, Sew-What Pattern Free Bags, Battle Hymn of Tiger Mother, Sound of a Wild Snail Eating, Animals Make us Human, A Fair Maiden, Goon Squad, America: You Sexy Bitch, Off the Cuff, One Man's Garden, At Home)
Ulysses writeup one good book
Gecko article
Revise sword in the hand
write up sword in the hand
post sword in the hand
Review of Dog Stars
Peachberry pie, 3-tomato eggplant parmesan, and stirfry recipe writeup + carrot-saffron risotto and sweet potato soup
Salty Mango Lassi Ice Cream recipe writeup + photo to flickr, LJ
Writeup of MWPAI exhibits

To read:
Finish Hare w/Amber Eyes
Restart Ulysses
Find public-domain bilingual copy of Brothers Dostovesky, read once Ulysses is done

To website:
Catification writeup + submission
Website design - doesn't have to be fancy, check pininterest re: color schemes
Addon website for Paws & Claws petsitting
Twitter design - should mirror website
LJ design - should mirror website - embed?
Upload final foxes video to Youtube, Flickr
Upload historical local house photos to Flickr in new set, email url to historic preservation people
Upload baby shower photos to Flickr, email url to C & B
1 hr Help mom with photo upload/CD burn
Upload B. bd party photos to Flickr, email URL to Bethany
Get Genderplayful setup with winter hat pack items
Email butter lady for mom
Fish photos, drop off camera to process scan in photos, upload to Flickr
Upload cat show photos to flickr
KeePassX

To design:
Business cards for Paws & Claws petsitting

To post:
Business cards for Paws & Claws
Return ASL DVD to library, get ASL book instead

Games:
Take Go books out of the library again, but this time one at a time
Continue playing through chapter-end book questions on Goban
Play Glitch again, determine if I still want my acct. there This game looks awesomer than ever; too bad it's too slow and keeps crashing my browser.

Jobs:
Notary Public Exam
MCPHS? list pro and con, talk with Peg J.
Check w/BMC CDO
IDG Copy Editor Framingham
Cooking vegan shit in Boston
Call back NH library though chances of hiring are slim since budget did not pass Yeah they hired people already
Catsitting gig 13th-Oct 1
Syracuse Public TV
Check out Peace Corps as a committment for various mental health and dietary reasons I don't think this would be a good idea for me at this time; something to keep in mind for future.
Sub. teaching
Hamilton Editing Position
Spring farm cares

Places to volunteer:
Call back zoo Docent Orientation Oct 14th
Call Boston zoos re: volunteer program http://www.zoonewengland.org/page.aspx?pid=242 apply for Keeper Aide when I am in the area
Get back in touch with BMC gender activism people - try emailing admissions again; get in touch with Wellesley & Holyoke alums
to this end call Rachel D. in Albany

Other things to apply to:
Financial aid for NBSS
Application for NBSS for spring 2013 pres. carpentry program
Tufts summer school session again should I again find myself in Somerville
Clarion 2013
Traditional Building Master's Deg. class at Boston Architectural College

Music:
Perform Für Elise for A. and B. while they are here This didn't get done
Finish composing "TimesNR" in Wario DIY & output to interwebs
Relearn Moonlight Sonata
Call Tina re: piano/organ lesson swap for vegan food? Left email for B.
Fix iTunes (Japanese & Russian transcription error correction, add correct composers for Holst & other classical for sort error correction. Upload entire CD library. Transfer cassettes not avail. on Amazon to MP3. Otherwise buy slowly w/change off of Amazon MP3. Sync iPod to use at gym.)

Exercise:
Go to the gym everyday. Use the time to listen to new music and relax. You don't have to prove any damn thing and if someone tries to make you guilty for spending time on yourself screw it.

Health:
Call foodstamps people and say your father is withholding necessary application info from you out of, apparently, sheer and total personal incompetence. Ask for next steps. Don't be embarrassed; It's not your fault the information has been withheld. Remember that getting rid of food insecurity and into food security will help you. You deserve to eat healthily. Read this article as many times as you need to to make the call.

Consult lawyer (K.?) to ask about statute of limitations on ENT doctor in Indiana who pumped me full of allergens after hospitalization Email K. again Look up stuff K advised me to

Call dojo that offers 1st month free + women's discounts to sit in on a muy tai or taichi class 6 pm beginner's class today Save up $ to restart martial arts

Call Alicia for Coffee

Pin down Brenda and mom for cat show times on 16th Sept. Hahaaa this is so not going to be decided until day of, but I try.

Call P. tomorrow re: catsitting 3 pm appt Sun done

Call D.K. re: fixing broken earrings Call Goldmine or Wilcox's jewelers & get rates Bring earring by, get estimate. Pick up fixed earrings

File:
Remaining stuff in filing cabinet.
Remaining email update list.
Combine buystuff email and personal email
Get new addresses for friends; update in Address book. Sync AB with iPod.
Sync AB with Google
Sync email list between private + personal email addresses.
Update all the accounts.
Stop Serbian hacker

Money:
List all accts in Manilia setup
List all accts in Mint
Balance checkbook + savings accts
Begin paying back remaining interest-bearing debts - call if necessary DONE
Begin paying back personal debts

Gender:
Tarot from Orion?
Consult self re: pronouns at end of year?
eredien: Dancing Dragon (Default)
2012-05-17 11:47 am

Moment of Change Anthology is Here!

Yay! Aqueduct Press' The Moment of Change feminist speculative poetry anthology is released and ready to order!

My poem "The Last Yangtze River Dolphin" is reprinted in it, but even if it wasn't, I'd be urging you to get this book. It's full of absolutely incredible poems by a hugely diverse group of people--women, men, genderqueer people, transgendered persons, straight people, queer people, people of color, and people who refuse to self-define.

The poems are mythic and simple; beautiful and complicated; bright and dark. Please read this book. If you are at Wiscon, you can get it there and go to a reading as well.
eredien: Dancing Dragon (Default)
2012-04-03 07:04 pm
Entry tags:

Kindle Cover Photos!

Kindle Cover - StretchKindle Cover - Side View/StandingKindle Cover - Front View

Art - Jewelry, a set on Flickr.

I got a Kindle for Christmas but couldn't find a cover I liked--too bulky, no functionality, too boring, made of leather...So I made one from this free and *fantastic* Kindle Cover Tutorial by Chica & Jo. All I can say is: 80's leftover (excuse me, vintage) pink striped denim and handmade jellyfish felt applique for the win! I name all my small electronics after animals; this one is "Cnidaria." Via Flickr:Art!

eredien: Dancing Dragon (Default)
2011-07-07 09:34 am
Entry tags:

Urban fantasy anthology reading next week!

Next week at Porter Square Books I hope to come in from work in time to catch the tail end of the Naked City anthology reading at 7 pm on July 14th. It looks like it's a fantastic anthology, with stories by some of my favorite writers, like [livejournal.com profile] crowleycrow and [livejournal.com profile] greygirlbeast . Please come and join me there--even though I'll be a bit late!
Posted via LjBeetle
eredien: Dancing Dragon (Default)
2011-04-12 05:23 pm

Some Quick Thoughts

- I have read 2 John Brunner novels in the past two days, The Shockwave Rider and Players at the Game of People. I did not like Players. Its allegory was way too heavy-handed, and its main female characters served to a.)be love interests for the viewpoint character and b.)act as a foil to the viewpoint character and show him the allegory wasn't what he thought it was. I didn't even find the premise clever beyond chapter three. I think this would have been way, way better as a short story. The novel was also racist (oh, John Brunner and your problematics!) I liked The Shockwave Rider, although I have a hard time remembering the title, since there are really no shockwaves or riding in the entire book (the title is a reference to the book that inspired it, Future Shock, which makes a lot of sense. It's just that I've never read Future Shock and keep forgetting its title because of that). I enjoy books with strong and intelligent women who love their boyfriends but don't take shit from their boyfriends, tame genetically-engineered mountain lions, narrow disasters averted by last-minute computer hacking, cool architecture, and men and people in general who listen to their consciences even when that decision is really pretty risky. Though a lot of the technology in this book is outdated (tape backups? Punch cards?) a lot of it isn't (pocket videophones? Wall-to-wall 3-D TVs?) and the ways in which the technology is *used* (to disrupt corrupt governments by strategically leaking classified government documents wikileaks style, to smuggle people out of secret detention facilities that are not supposed to exist, to dupe credulous parishioners out of money to line the pockets of unscrupulous priests, to give the police easy access to the movements of everyday citizens, to create new bio-technologies that show great technological promise for humanity but may also cross ethical and moral boundaries) is cutting-edge stuff.

- I made vegan vodka tomato pasta. It's good.

- Oolong has been exploring the outside back porch, which has a tall wood railing. She keeps trying to sneak out between the slats, though. I have to try her harness again, because she's so stupid she'll go right through and so uncoordinated that I'm kind of afraid she might fall off the porch down to the ground 2 stories below.

- I cry a lot in the shower, due to historical problems finding any truly private spaces indoors as a child. Now I have apparently associated showering with sadness, to the point where every single time in the past week that I have showered, I have cried for at least fifteen minutes afterward, often for no good reason, sometimes because I came to an important realization in the shower. It's annoying. But I am also due to get my period. More about this below.

- Tokai shed yesterday. Go, Tokai!

- My cousin in NYC is a fabric buyer for a place that sells huge amounts of fabrics to places that make clothes and then sell the resulting clothes to mass-market department stores across the US. I didn't know this, but when I found out, I forwarded her an article I'd read back in Feb. about fabrics and their representations of people of color. I implied there was a huge market in this stuff, especially for kids' clothes. Hopefully she and her employer will take the hint and make a load of money, and make a lot of kids and their parents really happy, by giving people awesome clothes featuring some people who might not all be white! :)

- I have resumed conversations with my parents, but think I will end them soonish. This will make visiting my family in NY in July difficult, since I want to see my sister and Jan and apparently Jan's sister and her boyfriend, but don't really want to interact with my parents much. However, when my father said I was sounding happier on the phone, I realized he just couldn't distinguish between my actual genuine happiness and my talking to him about random things because I felt it was my duty as his daughter. Granted, possibly this is also my problem, but since my mother also did not bring up the 20-minute conversation I had with her last week about why I had stopped talking to them for six months and needed to talk to them seriously about fixing some problems I had interacting with them, problems they were largely causing, I don't think that my conversations with them will be going anywhere near Genuine Happinessville, despite my trying to steer the metaphorical car in that direction, and I'd rather have no relationship at all with my parents than one that I feel is false on its face, when it could be so much more, but they just aren't interested in bringing up things that are hard for them to talk about or finding serious solutions for the problems they have with me and I with them, because they might get upset and need to cry or be angry for a while, at themselves or me or both, and showing weakness and asking for help to fix their relationship with me isn't ok, it's just easier to tell themselves they have a crazy and disrespectful daughter who they won't ever understand.

possible physical TMI warning (PMS), which also contains a recommendation for a Droid app
- I have installed the most-awesome ever application on my new android phone (all the features of the old sidekick, for the same amount of money a month, and backed by a company whose data servers probably won't go out of business anytime soon, like the Sidekick data people did constantly? Yay!) It is not the touch keyboard that lets me type almost as fast as I can read, which is still pretty cool. It is a thingy called OvuView, which is free, and lets you track your period. It also lets you track variables, such as "lots of cramps," or "mild headache," or "temperature," or "moodiness," or "appetite" or "sleeplessness." It also tells me when my period is probably going to be. Since I am *notoriously* bad at tracking this myself, to my detriment and the detriment of everyone around me, this app pings me every night and makes me enter as much or as little data as I want to enter. It's fantastic. Now I *know* that if I eat a half a pack of tofu during a protein craving, can't sleep, and cry for an hour, I can track it and see if there's a pattern instead of wondering why I feel like shit and want to sleep all the time. It makes me feel way more in control of my body and my mood. Instead of being buffeted around by mystery moods and sicknesses which may or may not be hormonal in origin, I can just put how I feel in the app, and go on with my life.
It projects the dates of your next period, too, and uh, probably does a lot of other stuff I haven't figured out yet. You can also apparently use it to calculate fertility (though this is not a feature of the app that I will be reviewing).
I've tried keeping a paper diary and a calendar about this before, because I know hormone-related moods and painful cramps were a big problem in my life and in other peoples' lives, but I never was able to remember which symptoms I was keeping track of in my little notes, and sometimes I forgot to track it, and would have to start all over again, and since I was feeling like crap, I'd get discouraged that I couldn't even keep a period journal write and cry for an extra hour. This app? If I'm feeling like crap, it takes me a minute to open up the application and say so, and then I know I don't have to *remember* it to write it down later, and so I won't worry about it all day when I'm already having PMS and mood swings, and won't get home and forget what I was going to write down, so my fears of being an abnormal freak whose hormones are even affecting her memory, and hence her sense of self as a woman and a capable person in general, is *gone.* It's AWESOME. Recommended.

Ultimate goal: convince my doctor, using historical data, that I really do have some kind of freaky hormonal imbalance that turns me into a saltwater tears factory with no desire to eat; instant, painful, and socially awkward GI problems; and the desire to hide under a blanket with a warm cat for one week out of every four a month, and convince her that it is really ruining my life, so I can figure out what to do from there that's not hormonal birth control (which makes me that person for the whole month straight, and scared my partner and me the whole time I was on it because I would start crying as I was smiling, which I'd not done much before I took the medicine, but restarted my period on a regular basis, and which I've been doing an awful lot since having my period on a regular basis).
eredien: Dancing Dragon (Default)
2011-03-18 07:07 pm
Entry tags:

MLP Moonwise

So...I just started watching the new MLP series. (Thanks,[livejournal.com profile] rax.) And...well, honestly, this episode is basically Moonwise, summer solstice celebration, evil moon-based sister avatar...um, yeah. It's great.
eredien: Dancing Dragon (Default)
2011-03-05 03:10 pm

Book Review as Wine Review: "The Mysterious Case of Nancy Drew & the Hardy Boys"

Books as Wine: The Mysterious Case of Nancy Drew & the Hardy Boys, Carole Kismaric & Marvin Heiferman

First impressions: I have not read the authors' other book, "Growing up with Dick and Jane." This is a coffee-table book which purported to discuss the politics of early childrens' publishing, as well as the historical conception of teen and pre-teen life in America through the idea of famous American mystery series franchises for teens. I thought it would be interesting to read that book, especially since as a young child I inhaled--with equal parts boredom, annoyance, and speed--my mother's collection of 1940's era Nancy Drew books, simply because they were in the house and were printed words on a page, and realized even at the time they were racist, not very original, or well-written. I wanted to see how the authors tackled those topics.

The book started off with a relatively discussion of the building of an early publishing franchise/empire for the newly created idea of "teenagers," which was interesting enough, and relatively straightforward coffee-table-historical-biography fare, if not particularly well-written.

Middle: Halfway through, I still thought it would be interesting to read that book, but realized this book was about as far away from that book as as you could get while still purporting to be the same thing--the way that a chocolate donut hole from Dunkin' Donuts and a 5-layer French mousse dessert with handmade caramel chocolates are both "chocolate desserts," but that's about all that can be said in terms of their similarities.

You can tell which parts of this book are written by the female author, and which parts are written by the male author (hint: the male author writes about the Hardy Boys series); paragraph transitions are just that clunky. This type of book is one that gives me hope that someday my works will be published in softcover, but gives me hope for all the wrong reasons--namely, if they're publishing this dreck, they'll probably enjoy a neatly-formatted ms of any of my high school essays even more. A sample paragraph transition: "On the other hand, unlike Frank and Joe Hardy, who join the line in the literary pantheon of male adventurers, Nancy Drew bears a special responsibility: she stakes out new territory by showing girls how to take action..."

There are also pages in this book which are an attempt to tie the book's main subject--the history of these two American novel series, and their evolving interpretations of the [straight, white] American teenager--to the rise of a special idea of "American teenage culture" and that idea's evolution over the past 150 years. They don't. For instance: there is one page is basically about John Wayne being the 1950's masculine ideal, which is not only a debatable point in and of itself, but is tied to the Hardy Boys' series by the authors basically saying, 'John Wayne has quality x, y, and z. The Hardy Boys do, too.' There's another side-note, about civil rights and race in the 1960's, which doesn't mention either series of books at all: it starts off by basically saying, 'some teens in the 60's were concerned about their clothes and hair as teenagers, but other teenagers had to deal with racism! Here's a stock photo of school integration!' You start to check for tipped-in pages, strange glues or bindings, indicating these pages weren't actually original to the book and were ripped out of a particularly bad American history text and pasted in. Alas.

If the authors wrote this book in their sleep, the photos and illustrations must have been gleaned from a particularly somnambulistic episode.
As far as I can tell, there are three types of illustration in the book:
1.) Scans of out-of-copyright Hardy Boys and Nancy Drew cover art, endpapers, etc.
2.) A bunch of stock photos of people between the ages of 10 and 30 doing things, which are related to the book's main subject matter with captions so transparently padded as to be laughable.

For instance, on a page where the main text discusses the rise of the adult detective/mystery novel and claims, without evidence, that the popular adult format was a publishing goldmine when the heroes became teenagers ("pure inspiration for kids whose lives are defined by changes and confusion, whose growing bodies often feel like haunted houses" [?!?]), there is a sidebar titled, without preamble, "Other Brother Acts," which discusses: The Jackson 5, the Kennedys, the Righteous Brothers, and the Groucho Brothers. No joke. It is left to the reader to make the tenuous, and hilarious, connection between such sidebars and the main "ideas," such as they are, of the book.

I kept desperately wanting to see the book segue into a "Pat the Bunny" parody:
- "The Hardy Brothers are brothers. Here are some other brothers. Many people have brothers. Do you have a brother?"
- "Both Nancy Drew and the Hardy Boys were made into TV shows. TV shows are generally popular with teenagers. Here are some other TV shows which were popular with teenagers. Can you name any other TV shows which are popular with teenagers?"
- "Nancy Drew's father was a man who was an apolitical cipher of a father figure. Here are some real men who were deeply involved in politics in America, who could arguably be called father figures if you were of a certain political bent. Do you have a political bias and a license from Corbis that only allows you access to certain historical stock photos?"

3.) Scanned-in, copyright-free advertising drawings and line art from the 20's through the 50's, often with no caption at all.

For instance, in the page facing the opening of chapter 2 (creatively titled "Action, Action Action," but in three different typefaces so it looks...action-y), we see a collage made of four images: a cropped partial scan of a Nancy Drew book cover, a photo or film still from the 50's of a "friendly white male neighborhood cop type" laughingly separating two white elementary-school age boys who were throwing ineffective punches at each other, a B&W line drawing of a giant fist which has captured tiny people a la Gulliver's travels, and what appears to be a scan of an interior end-page from a Hardy Boys book. The text accompanying this collage is all about the improbability of the perfect, scenic, idyllic, yet somehow constantly crime-ridden towns which the Hardy Boys and Nancy Drew live in.

Finish: At times, it's hard to tell if the authors are aware of their absurd padding of what could otherwise be an informative and relatively factual two-page historical society pamphlet about franchised publishing efforts in the nineteen-teens and are amused by it, or if they are totally unaware of their gender, historical, political, and cultural bias.

Here are some items that point toward the authors' own awareness of the absurdity of this book:
"In fact, the two of them [Nancy Drew and her father Carson] seem more like husband and wife than parent and child--Carson doesn't flinch when his attractive daughter playfully runs her hands through his wavy hair. When the two Drews flirt shamelessly, which they often do, they're unaware of the dark psychological undercurrents that kept twentieth-century shrinks' couches warm."

"[The Hardy Boys] simply affirm their loyalties, believe in their own involunerability and unwavering moral strength, and act out their version of masculinity in a timeless, endless loop of thrilling excitements. The Hardy Boys never stop and, like most men who are married to their jobs, can't imagine retiring."

"Nancy has no mother to apprentice herself to, no homework that needs to be done. She has no worries about money nor chores around the house..."

Here are some items that point toward the authors' plain and painful biases:
"...But shopping at Burk's Department Store or eating dainty luncheons with her nice but conventional friends just isn't enough for ambitious Nancy Drew. The only time she feels truly alive is when she's on a job....when Nancy's not working she feels 'empty,' she can't sit still and seems restless at play. Lucky for her that just as she's obsessively thinking that she'd 'go to the ends of the earth to find another mystery,' someone in need rings her doorbell, or something unsettling...grabs her attention and snaps her back to life." (Yes, that's a continuation of the above sentence).

"The Hardys' boy friends are important throughout the series, but because the preteen kids reading the Hardy Boys are not particularly interested in romance, the presence of girls in the mysteries is insignificant. They have to make an appearance, of course, for otherwise the Hardy Boys and their pals' sexuality would be a little suspect."

"Young teen girls like the thrill of romance, not the ickiness of sex, and that may explain why Nancy Drew's a little bit blase on the subject of romance[...]Nancy doesn't need Ned. She's got her own car and money and is too busy to be needy. To be honest, Nancy knows that Ned's got nowhere else to go; he lives to serve her and isn't interesting enough to merit a book series of his own."

A sidebar, discussing the rise of the popularity of mystery fiction based on true crimes of the 20's, is illustrated with another seemingly unrelated stock photo, this one of a hangman's noose. And then I got to this sentence: "Bullet-riddled bodies, sexpot killers, and machine-gun blowouts became the symbols of hard-boiled detective fiction, now known as 'crime novels' and lambasted by some critics, who called them 'really prolonged literary lynchings.' (Really. Really really. I shit you not).

And then there are really the sentences that make you wonder if this book isn't a sadistic plot on the part of the authors to drive you crazy trying to decide between self-aware, ironic arch commentary winking at itself, the most breathtakingly unaware stereotyping you've ever seen, something that makes you laugh in horror:
"Teen detective Nancy Drew is nothing like most young girls--boy-crazy, always on the phone, morbid, mooning over unicorns, or subject to fits of uncontrollable giggles. [...] A clotheshorse with an ever-expanding wardrobe, Nancy acts out every girl's desire for material goods..."

"Nancy's been raised to take men for what they are in her world--sometimes helpful, sometimes troublesome, but more often than not, criminals. She's usually more capable than they are; no wonder they tie her up, gag her, lock her in closets, and knock her unconscious."

"[Nancy Drew's] persona--equal parts girl, boy, teenager, and adult--allows her to blossom in a man's world without giving up the perks of being a girl and frees her and her readers from a prison of gender expectations."

This book is a sexist, racist, boring bit of tripe, with an interesting three-pages-at-most aside on the history of publishing syndicates which catered to childrens' literature as a new market, and another half-paragraph at the end about the fact that the books were eventually revised to take out some of the most egregious stereotypes about non-white WASPS (not how they were revised, not why--that would have been interesting--just that they were). The subject of the book was sexist, racist bits of tripe for children, but it was made more horrible to read by the fact that the authors knew this, and could only sporadically bring themselves to comment acerbically on the dark undertones of the otherwise stupid, repetitive, impossible, perfect, biased, sheltered lives of the characters these books held up as role models.

I guess that if the authors had consistently trashed the books, perhaps they wouldn't have gotten paid for writing it, but I wonder if they would have been happier people. I also wonder if they really wanted to trash the books consistently, which is a rather unsettling thing to wonder about.

In the end, this book was worth reading only because I knew if I finished it, I would be able to ethically write this review, trashing both the book and its fawning devotion to both series, which was a joy to do.

Pairs well with: a light trepanning.

Wine this book most reminds me of: the dusty 6-pack of 1987 "Seasons' Best" holiday beer sitting in the basement of my parents' home since that date, which they will not throw out, but cannot drink--at least not without major stomach pumping.
eredien: Dancing Dragon (Default)
2011-02-27 05:08 pm
Entry tags:

Book Sale

I will be getting rid of most of my books within the next two months or so. If there are any books of mine that you would like to have, please let me know by posting to this post. Eventually I will post a list here, and probably have a garage-sale kind of thing for the ones people don't claim here.
eredien: Dancing Dragon (Default)
2010-11-15 04:48 pm
Entry tags:

Book Request

Does anyone out there have a copy of Hansen & Quinn's "Greek: An Intensive Course" that they don't want, that I could buy off them cheap, or make some other kind of arrangement?

Tried to get it from the library, but the Boston Public Library has it for in-house use only (!?), and the Minuteman Library System keeps referring me to the Complete Third Season of Veronica Mars on DVD instead (??!).
eredien: Dancing Dragon (Default)
2010-09-03 12:41 am

Thoughts on Possible Futures

So, I need to apply to some jobs. But I'm stuck.

I can either:
1.) Apply to part-time jobs, or temp jobs for commission, that will leave me with time and energy to work a second part-time job for no pay (art and writing), which has massive happiness benefits for me. These jobs will not have health benefits.

2.) Apply to full-time jobs which will leave me with health benefits, but not have any energy or time left over for art and writing once I, say, have eaten dinner and cleaned the laundry. (I thought I could do this, and worked from 2005-2010 in jobs that I thought would let me do this, and it didn't happen. If I go this route, I will give up art as a career--I don't want to squander another half-decade of my life pretending like I'm going to write a novel, but knowing full well it's not going to happen because I've got no time or energy).

Oh, and I also need to:
- Get an apartment
- Move again, paying all moving expenses
- Figure out a way to afford grad school
- Pay for expenses, including special cat food that runs $45/bag

I'm secretly terrified of going to grad school. Remember that summer course I tried to take a while ago, the Urban Studies one at Tufts, which I was really excited about and was going to use to catapault myself back into academia and figuring out what I wanted to do for grad school for real?

I quit not because the workload was too much, but because when I tried to do the readings to do the work, the part of my brain that understands how to do hard academic reading shut down--and doing the work was impossible under those conditions. I was reading the words, but couldn't remember the ideas in the individual sentences long enough to follow a train of thought through a paragraph, much less from one paragraph to the next. I would finish an article, and have no ability to recall or summarize the main points of what I just read. And this is urban studies, not literary theory--the points are generally pretty straightforward, like "we can use these techniques to increase pedestrian safety; here's why America isn't using them."

That's also why the paper I gave a week later at Readercon was something that I was ashamed of--it felt like it kind of ran from point to point, and when Thrud asked a question that made sense given the paper's topic, I panicked because her question (about the trope of the flawed hero in early myth) literally made no sense to me. I heard the words coming out, in academic English, but I did not understand her question because I could not parse the sentence because I didn't catch the individual words. This was humiliating. I'd never written a paper that I wasn't proud of before, much less given one that I wasn't happy with at a professional conference.

I told everyone that it was the workload because I felt freaked out, confused, and ashamed, and had no idea what had happened to my brain or my ability to remember or think. I saw indications of the problem before--I thought that I was just rusty--by subjecting myself to things like independent essay-writing projects or summer classes, I would soon get back into the thick of things, and not have to worry about it, but the problem got worse as soon as I tried to fix it.

The same thing happens with novels. Unless I write down what I am thinking about the novel immediately after I read it (which is why I have been writing book reviews), I forget that I read it. I don't remember what it was about. I don't remember the characters very well. If it pick it up again I will remember that I read it, but it's like a transient experience.

That's why the only thing I've really been reading lately is political commentary and webcomics. The former is a few paragraphs that I can understand in a short burst of thought; the latter is not reading in the way that I usually understand it in that it is not entirely audio-based (when I read, I hear the phrases more or less spoken aloud in my head, and with comics, it's more like a movie, since a setting/scene is also provided).

For someone who desperately needs intellectual stimulation to keep her happy, I am pretty miserable, and I have no idea what to do about it. I've been miserable like this since I graduated college, when I felt intellectually at the top of my game and then took a minimum wage job working a call-center because that was all that was available, and then a job where I was routinely writing at top-speed, and editing, but not reading that much.

This is why, if you ask me to do something, sometimes I will stand there slack-jawed. I am not trying to be stupid. I am trying to remember what the word "washcloth" means.

This is why I haven't pursued grad school, while having dreams about screaming in horrible jealousy at a roomful of the people I know who are attending grad school (which just made me feel like an ass). This is why I constantly complain about going back to school and don't, well, apply for anything. This is why I've only written a handful of poems since 2005, and one short story finished. This is why I've switched to doing things with my hands, and why I've started complaining about it--I love doing things with my hands, but not as a main occupation; the fact that I feel as if I have no other choice but to do the things I still feel I can do has embittered me about those things, and I can't love them as much as I want to, or need to.

I am kind of terrified, as the only thing that really gives my life a deep meaning is writing and thinking and reading, and I appear to be losing my access to...whatever it is that gives language meaning in my brain. Sometimes I can think, and write, and churn out an idea, and manage to fix it on the page as a poem or something, or maybe part of a story.
But even then there's a clarity lacking that I know I am hieing after, and not finding. And I don't know what to do about any of it.

I'm really, really scared.

And I'm broke, so I need a job, desperately.

And I'm not sure which kind of job to pick. I desperately want to be able to do art and writing, but I don't know what to do about this problem where I read a page of, say, critical literary theory, or a long-form article, or a novel, and then want to go hide in a corner for the next hour because I can't understand it and don't remember it and can't...think...about it.

That's never happened before, and it's terrifying; I feel really broken in a fundamental way. I have no idea why. Did my brain just get through Bryn Mawr and give up? That feels really--not correct, as a theory, to me. I mean, I've been reading, and understanding and caring about reading, since before I cared about almost anything else in my life. But I could do it once, right, and do it brilliantly to boot--so why not now, when I need and want to?

Given all of this, what kinds of jobs should I apply to? Does anyone have thoughts?

It's taken me a really long time to talk about this--to think about this--because most of the people I know, and all of the people I care about, are really smart people. They value smartness, and quickness of wit and of mind, and that particular type of friendship that comes from recommending mutually agreeable books to each other, and the ability to have an intellectual discussion and follow a thread of argument, and valuing it when they learn a new word or idea. And I used to be one of those people. And I still care passionately about those things. And because I was surrounded--I surrounded myself--with people like that, like myself, it was harder to notice when I felt things going away; and once I realized what was happening, last summer, I was too scared to speak up because, well, things like that just don't go away, do they? And if they do, what will you be left with if you've spent your whole life being smart and thinking of yourself as smart and gradually feel like you don't know how to conduct a conversation anymore, and can't read your way through a text you'd read in highschool without losing a plot point?

It's why I've sat glumly through a lot of interesting intellectual discussions in the past year, while my friends kept looking over at me, wondering why I wasn't joining it, and why I declined to say anything if invited. I couldn't follow the threads of most arguments in book group, for instance; I couldn't understand the way that the sentences that people were speaking built up into a comment or theory or joke; it's been really hard for me to interact with people new and old.

I spent a lot of time thinking about this while putting together a puzzle in the gaming room at Anthrocon--a puzzle, simple, because I couldn't follow the rules for the new expansion of Race for the Galaxy, and kept losing my place when I tried to write the essay I was to present the following week--and feeling terrified that I was going to lose myself and the relationships that I cared about because I couldn't force myself to be intellectual enough for me to be happy, anymore. And now I feel like I kind of have lost those things, because my lack of pursuit of intellectual things and bitterness about working with my hands, which I loved to do before, ate into my life and my relationships. And I spent a lot of time thinking about it when I was outside, or constructing things with my hands, over the last year. That, too, was creative work, and worthwhile--so why was I so bitter about doing it? Why was I saying I hated it, and presenting myself to others as if I hated it, and complaining incessantly that it took up time from art, when what I hated was the feeling that I had to be working with my hands, because that was the only thing I was good at, anymore? I could easily have made time for art in my life, but was terrified that I would try and fail, again.

That's what I've been thinking about a lot, since that summer school session, and things have definitely come to a point where I can't ignore the question anymore.

Thoughts...would be really appreciated, here.

[Addendum: I first noticed this problem when I realized I was having a hard time remembering song lyrics, something I had always been able to do with no effort. This is largely why I don't sing anymore.]
eredien: Dancing Dragon (Default)
2010-06-08 11:38 am
Entry tags:

Book Review as Wine Review: Hugh Pine, Janwillem Lincoln van de Wetering

First impressions: This is a children's book featuring a lot of roadkill, a sub-header reading "Hugh doesn't want to be a man. He just wants to look like one," and an anthropomorphic porcuipine who is mistaken for human by everyone except the post-office manager. I found all of these things strange even when I first read it in third-grade or so, and continue to find them strange every time I reread this book, but you can already tell that this cannot be an unbiased review.

Middle: It was only last night, after rereading this book for maybe the 10th time, that I realized that the book is actually about how hard it is to find satisfactory solutions to the problem of freedom vs. security for both the individual and a collective group of people, and about how hard it is for those boundaries to be navigated among and between cultural and linguistic divides, and especially about the problems that happen when said cultures understand each other just enough so that the solutions that at first look good to later turn out to be very wrong indeed. It is also a book about how animals don't make the same decisions people do, despite having the human world imposing its decisions on them. It is also about a loner trying to deal with things that scare him once he recognizes that the right thing to do is both a.) right and b.) not easy c.) there would be consequences to a decision to choose not to act, as well. It's also a book about how it's necessary for each person to make their own decision about how to draw that boundary, and how sometimes the boundaries that work for most people won't work for all.

Finish: This book is hilarious. "Hugh Pine stayed very still. Maybe they would go away. But the noise only got worse. They were shouting and banging on the tree. Hugh Pine snorted. He began to climb down....'We are the committee,' the three porcupines said. 'Very nice,' Hugh Pine said. 'How very good of you to be the committee, and how very good of you to come and see me. Why don't you go away?'"

I understand that the author also wrote an introduction to Buddhism for children.

Pairs well with: pecan pie, coffee with cream, Lies my Teacher Told me by James W. Loewen.
eredien: Dancing Dragon (Default)
2010-06-08 11:04 am
Entry tags:

Book Review as Wine Review: Citrus County, John Brandon

First impressions: I hadn't read John Brandon's earlier novel, Arkansas, though we have it in the house. But yesterday Citrus County came in the mail, and the tactile cover drew me in (oh, McSweeney's production values!)

Middle: So there's going to be a lot written on this book about how it's a great book about junior high, teenagers, etc. And it is. But just saying that leaves out, I feel, one of the things that I most appreciated about it: while the book was often set inside a junior high, and three of the main characters were strongly associated with the junior high (Shelby & Toby are students, and Mr. Hibma one of their teachers), the book wasn't about junior high. It wasn't about sex or hard moral choices or teenage romance in the way that a saturday after-school special is about those things. Rather, it was about those things in the way that life is about those things. It took the idea of "junior highschool students are able to make hard moral choices" not as its moral, but as its beginning, as its starting axiom, the way that other novels about adults assume it from the get-go.

I can't tell you much about the plot without spoliers, except that it revolves around a character who's not actually present for most of the book (not really a plot- or writing-trick; just a quirk of the particular social type of narrative the book is structured around), and that Shelby and Toby might be in love.

The writing is quite plain in most places, but plain in a way that's beautiful in its sparseness, like the way a cinderblock building can be beautiful in its sparseness. It's narrated in turn by different characters--Shelby, Toby, and Mr. Hibma, for the most part.

Finish: It is also a study of the ways that depression manifests itself. It is not a happy book, though it has what would be conventionally considered to be an incredibly happy ending, plotwise. You could take the same plot and characters in this book and come out easily with a sensational beach-read-type of book, and countless authors have, but Brandon veers away from taking the easy choices, plot and characterwise--as if those easy choices hadn't actually existed in the first place. That, I think, is what I like most about Citrus County: it seems like the idea that easy choices don't exist in the first place is both embedded into the book's style and constitutes the book's theme.

Pairs well with: this book basically made up for my reading My Sister's Keeper earlier this summer, which looked like it was going to be about hard choices and then the author's deus ex machina showed up to make the ending conventionally happy. It would be an interesting experiment to try and read these books back-to-back to compare how authors manipulate readers when the characters are in difficult situations.
eredien: Dancing Dragon (Default)
2008-11-09 01:04 pm

One Classic Book 2008: Selection

So every year about this time I try to pick one large, classic book to read. The first year I did The Children's Hospital by Chris Adrian (it's not a classic yet, but it should be and, I believe, will become one with time). Last year I did Victor Hugo's Les Miserables. This year I have settled on James Joyce's Ulysses, on the assumption that:

1.) I tried it in the spring and it was too hot to keep reading, as my attention span shrinks to a nub at temperatures over 80 degrees F. That will not be a problem now.
2.) I have already done a lot of research into Irish politics, theatre, poetry, and the intersection of the three from 1910-1940. I feel like I should be able to get at least some of the topical references without absolutely wracking my brain.
3.) Since I am planning on spending the rest of my life with [livejournal.com profile] raxvupine, I will need to read this book at some point. Why not now?

Keep tuned as things progress.

--

Hung out with [livejournal.com profile] twitch124 yesterday at a book signing for Chris Onstad, who does the Achewood webcomic. Saw her new place, met her snake, and had a good conversation all round. I don't read Achewood, but it was still wonderful to see 200+ people in line at the store.

I wasn't planning on buying anything, but I picked up:
- a copy of the shiny new hardcover edition of vol. 1 of Osamu Tezuka's Blackjack manga, a perrennial favorite of mine. I was thrilled; I didn't even know it was out and the previous printings of Blackjack in English are incomplete and almost impossible to find. I didn't even know what it was; I just picked it off up the shelf and then squealed in joy.

- A new Ted Naifeh book in the Courtney Crumrin series, Courtney Crumrin and the Fire Thief's Tale. Posits neat how-werewolves-came-to-be story and develops the relationship between Courtney and her mysterious Uncle Aloysius further. I love these books; they're fun to read and don't insult my intelligence when I'm looking for something a bit lighter. I wish he'd hurry up and write more, though. Naifeh's slow as a teenaged goth trying to get out of bed.

- [livejournal.com profile] twitch124: I remembered the title of the webcomic I've started reading. It's Gunnerkrigg Court, by Tom Siddell.