I find myself dealing with this a lot. I'm an outsider. I've been kept apart since as far back as I can remember, from my family, and thus from my circle of friends. I was always thrust into a type of 'mentor' or leadership role; the one who was kept in the forefront because he could see the issues from all sides and play the peacemaker/diplomat between one group or another.
It's lonely, yes. And often, you feel like you might just fit in somewhere, only to have someone say or do something (whether consciously or subconsciously) to show you're still an 'interloper' or 'outsider' and thus not really a part of that group.
In all honesty, I see so many who are like that, or just don't hold to the norms of a given culture or society, and they seem so... ~lost~ and abandoned. (That's the only way I can really explain it, though that's not really right either.) They want to belong, but have no real culture, and lack the ability to found one on their own, so they seek out groups to try to fit into. Most find the more deviant vestiges of international society's groupings... the ones that are more apathetic, or sordid, or even reserved. And they might feel comfortable with one or another for a while, but like all groups, these all go through the states of forming, norming, storming, conforming and adjourning. Ever-shifting and changing, eventually to the point that one doesn't feel comfortable there, at one of these stages, and moves on to some other group. An endless cycle.
Categorizing someone as Otherkin might work for a few, for others it doesn't. It's all a matter of what one is comfortable with. But in the end, we do find a few who hold ties that bind... interests that hold enough similarity that form a bond and hold a connection. These are the ones who we sometimes take as mates, or other times consider our dearest friends or surrogate family.
Given time, we all come to the conclusion that there are many groups, but we are only truly a part of the group we each form ourselves.
This is what I've learned just through living life and studying relationships. I thought I should share it with you.
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It's lonely, yes. And often, you feel like you might just fit in somewhere, only to have someone say or do something (whether consciously or subconsciously) to show you're still an 'interloper' or 'outsider' and thus not really a part of that group.
In all honesty, I see so many who are like that, or just don't hold to the norms of a given culture or society, and they seem so... ~lost~ and abandoned. (That's the only way I can really explain it, though that's not really right either.) They want to belong, but have no real culture, and lack the ability to found one on their own, so they seek out groups to try to fit into. Most find the more deviant vestiges of international society's groupings... the ones that are more apathetic, or sordid, or even reserved. And they might feel comfortable with one or another for a while, but like all groups, these all go through the states of forming, norming, storming, conforming and adjourning. Ever-shifting and changing, eventually to the point that one doesn't feel comfortable there, at one of these stages, and moves on to some other group. An endless cycle.
Categorizing someone as Otherkin might work for a few, for others it doesn't. It's all a matter of what one is comfortable with. But in the end, we do find a few who hold ties that bind... interests that hold enough similarity that form a bond and hold a connection. These are the ones who we sometimes take as mates, or other times consider our dearest friends or surrogate family.
Given time, we all come to the conclusion that there are many groups, but we are only truly a part of the group we each form ourselves.
This is what I've learned just through living life and studying relationships. I thought I should share it with you.